Let’s Talk Dick Pics

Men don’t send unsolicited dick pics as a come on. That might be the guise they use, kind of “Hey Baby, you like what you see?” And no. Just no. Make that fuck no. I have yet to see an impressive dick pic. I’m talking shitty lighting, unflattering angles, dirty fucking room. Some assholes don’t even bother to remove their Cheeto stained sweat pants completely. Most of the time I have no idea what they’re bragging about either. I also don’t think that, especially at this point in time, men think this works as a pickup either. Ever. There are plenty of places to share nude pictures where they will not only be welcomed but also appreciated. They may think you want to see it, but they’re completely fucking delusional. Ultimately, It’s about control.

It’s always about control. It’s akin to some jackass screaming “nice tits” from a moving vehicle or catcalling in any form. It’s not a compliment. Catcalling is letting you know that your body is public domain, they have the upper hand, and they can do and say as they see fit. They can treat you however they want, like a piece of meat, something that is there for the taking. They do it to humiliate you. They do it to control you. It is most definitely not a come on. It’s all about showing you who’s boss.

Don’t believe me? Go out with your husband, boyfriend, or a trusted male friend and just gauge the difference. It’s night and day. The difference is staggering. It is as if we live on two different planets; one with a male escort and one where we have to brave it on our own. Night and day. Except of course we wouldn’t know as much about night, not alone anyway, because it’s too dangerous for us to venture out alone, pretty much anywhere in the United States. We are always on guard. We have to be. It can get dangerous in a hurry. And it’s everywhere. In this country. Today. In 2017.

You're a piece of shit and I can prove it mathematically...

This same basic premise applies to unsolicited dick pics. The bottom line is you didn’t ask for it and you did not want it. It is more often than not a complete stranger waving his junk at you on your screen. Holy shit! What if an unsuspecting toddler, or anyone really, is in the room and you accidentally click on that dick pic, not knowing what was in store? Good lord, what if I’m eating? Gross. You have probably never uttered the words, after viewing a complete stranger’s dick pic, “Wow! I’m going to marry him some day.” Note, if this is your story, please show me (with his permission of course) because I want to see this awe-inspiring dick pic that changed your life. I won’t hold my breath. The dick pic is not about attraction. It’s about control.

What can be done about it? This is the frustrating part. So far not a lot. At least not through legal channels since they require a “persistent pattern of abuse.” Even then, it’s a never ending series of hoops to jump through for what will at best be a slap on the wrist. Why bother? I realize this part is infuriating as hell. It is for me too. But that dick pic is now your personal property. It was given to you by someone of their own free will whether you like it or not (and you don’t). Nevertheless, it is yours now and what you do with it is entirely up to you.

I'm not telling you what to do....

That dick pic is under your control. It’s your property. Any man forfeits his right to privacy the second he decides to send an unsolicited picture of his junk. There’s nothing private about that. And I hate to break it to these assholes, there’s nothing private about the internet. Not really. I understand that the second I send a nude, anywhere and by whatever means, it is out of my control. Literally. I accept that fact because that is the truth. Once you send it, it’s out there. Forever.

An unsolicited dick pic is now out of his control as well. I’m not going to tell you what to do with it, let’s be clear. I’m explaining my take on things based on my own experience. If he’s on Facebook or other social media and has a wife or girlfriend, I would at the very least let her know. I know I’d want to know if I were in her shoes.
The last time I received a dick pic via Facebook, I posted it, censored of course. I blocked the name and profile pic originally, but later reconsidered as I was being asked over and over by friends. We had 70 mutual friends, many of whom were women, and they wanted to know. They wanted to protect themselves. Many of the men wanted to know too so they could take that trash off their friends list. But he chose to put that out there, to a stranger and not at all anonymously. He took that risk. And it backfired, big time. I believe his employer and family members were even notified, but I say “I believe” because my friends took up the cause on my behalf without me even asking. Why? Because we are tired of this shit. I am tired of this shit They keep doing it because they’re are no repercussions, no consequences. Well, there were that time and I am happy to say I haven’t received a dick pic since. Plenty of other disgusting shit, but no dick pics.

I’m not prescribing this course of action, merely telling you my story. Whether you delete and move on or put them on full blast, it’s your call and I will support you. However, to the men who do this, if you send an unsolicited dick pic, you’re a piece of shit, and I can prove it mathematically.

Special thanks to Bryan Klaproth for the Pickle Rick Dick Pic, the meme, and especially that last line. That was all him. And I also want to thank you for your unconditional support which is truly appreciated. All of my male allies are greatly appreciated, and don’t you forget it.